This is an absolute CLASSIC! Only a South African will understand it!
Boere Computer Dictionary from South Africa
Monitor - Keeping an eye on the braai
Download - Get the firewood off the bakkie
Hard drive - Trip back home without any cold beer
Keyboard -Where you hang the bakkie and bike keys
Window - What you shut when it's cold
Screen - What you shut in the mosquito season
Byte -What mosquitoes do
Bit - What mosquitoes did
Mega Byte - What mosquitoes at the dam do
Chip -A bar snack
Micro Chip -What's left in the bag after you have eaten the chips
Modem - What you did to the lawns
Dot Matrix - Oom Jan Matrix's wife (classic!)
Laptop - Where the cat sleeps
Software - Plastic knives and forks you get at KFC
Hardware - Real stainless steel knives and forks from Checkers
Mouse - What eats the grain in the shed
Mouse Pad - Where the mouse takes the grain it does not eat
Mainframe - What holds the shed up
Web - What spiders make
Web Site - The shed (or under the verandah)
Cursor - The old bloke what swears a lot
Search Engine - What you do when the bakkie won't go
Yahoo - What you say when the bakkie does go
Upgrade - A steep hill
Server - The person at the pub that brings out the lunch
Mail Server - The bloke at the pub that brings out the lunch
User - The neighbour that keeps borrowing things
Network - When you have to repair your fishing net
Internet - Complicated fish net repair method
Netscape - When fish maneuvers out of reach of net
Online - When you get the laundry hung out
Off Line - When the pegs don't hold the washing up
Floppy Drive ----- When you take your plaas wekkas to the clinic . . .
Blog – shortened version of Braai Log
Virus – the reason your wekkas go on a floppy drive to the clinic
Anti – virus – the medication the wekkas get at the clinic
Virus protection – free condoms at the clinic
Stiffy – what happens to the wekkas when the anti-virus doesn’t wek