Ek het hierdie raakgelees wat iemand gedeel het. (Kon myself nie help om toe die direkte Engels met die hulp van google na Afrikaans te vertaal nie
)
"A friend went to Beijing recently and was given this brochure by the hotel. It is precious.
She is keeping it and reading it whenever she feels depressed.
Obviously, it has been translated directly, word for word from Mandarin to English.
Getting There:
Our representative will make you wait at the airport. The bus to the hotel runs along the lake shore. Soon you will feel pleasure in passing water. You will know that you are getting near the hotel because you will go round the bend. The manager will await you in the entrance hall. He always tries to have intercourse with all new guests.
The Hotel:
This is a family hotel, so children are very welcome. We, of course, are always pleased to accept adultery. Highly skilled nurses are available in the evenings to put down your children. Guests are invited to conjugate in the bar and expose themselves to others. But please note that ladies are not allowed to have babies in the bar. We organize social games, so no guest is ever left alone to play with them self.
The Restaurant:
Our menus have been carefully chosen to be ordinary and unexciting. At dinner, our quartet will circulate from table to table, and fiddle with you.
Your Room:
Every room has excellent facilities for your private parts. In winter, every room is on the heat. Each room has a balcony offering views of outstanding obscenity! .. You will not be disturbed by traffic noise since the road between the hotel and the lake is used only by paederasts.
Bed:
Your bed has been made in accordance with local tradition. If you have any other ideas please ring for the chambermaid. Please take advantage of her. She will be very pleased to squash your shirts, blouses and underwear. If asked, she will also squeeze your trousers.
Above All:
When you leave us at the end of your holiday, you will have no hope. You will struggle to forget it."
En so lyk dit direk vertaal vanuit Engels in Afrikaans:Amper daar:
Ons verteenwoordiger sal jou op die lughawe laat wag. Die bus na die hotel loop langs die dam. Binnekort sal jy plesier voel om water te verby. Jy sal weet dat jy naby die hotel kom omdat jy die draai gaan omdraai. Die bestuurder sal in die ingangsaal wag. Hy probeer altyd omgaan met alle nuwe gaste.
Die hotel:
Dit is 'n familie hotel, dus kinders is baie welkom. Ons is natuurlik altyd bly om owerspel te aanvaar. Hoogs geskoolde verpleegkundiges is in die aande beskikbaar om jou kinders neer te sit. Gaste word uitgenooi om in die kroeg te verbind en hulself aan ander bloot te stel. Maar let asseblief daarop dat dames nie toegelaat word om babas in die kroeg te hê nie. Ons organiseer sosiale speletjies, dus geen gas word ooit alleen gelaat om met hulle self te speel nie.
Die restaurant:
Ons spyskaarte is noukeurig gekies om gewone en unexciting te wees. Tydens aandete sal ons kwartet van tafel tot tafel sirkuleer en aan jou voel met hulle vingers.
Jou kamer:
Elke kamer beskik oor uitstekende fasiliteite vir u private onderdele. In die winter is elke kamer op die hitte. Elke kamer het 'n balkon met uitsig op uitstaande obsceniteit! Jy sal nie versteur word deur verkeerslawaai nie, aangesien die pad tussen die hotel en die meer net deur paederasts gebruik word.
bed:
Jou bed is gemaak volgens plaaslike tradisie. As u enige ander idees het, skakel asseblief vir die kamermaande. Neem asseblief voordeel van haar. Sy sal baie graag jou hemde, bloese en onderklere pluk. As dit gevra word, sal sy ook jou broek druk.
Bowenal:
As jy ons aan die einde van jou vakansie verlaat, sal jy geen hoop hê nie. Jy sal sukkel om dit te vergeet. "