Die Afrikaanse Forum

Die kuierstoep => Die Gorrel plek => Topic started by: Meraai vannie Baai on January 18, 2019, 01:54:33 AM

Title: As jy praat voor jy dink...
Post by: Meraai vannie Baai on January 18, 2019, 01:54:33 AM
FIRST TESTIMONY:
I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly,
'How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?'
I turned around and walked back out and never went back
My husband didn't say a word... He knew better.

SECOND TESTIMONY:
I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls.
I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using.
After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store
He asked if he could help me.
Without thinking, I looked at him and said, 'I think I like playing with men's balls'

THIRD TESTIMONY:
My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a
variety of candy and nuts.
As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help.
I replied, 'No, I'm just looking at your nuts.'
My sister started to laugh hysterically.
The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day, my sister has never let me forget it.

FOURTH TESTIMONY :
While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok.
I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons.
I told her that if she did not start behaving 'right now' she would be punished.
To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening,
'If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!'
The s silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange.
Even the tellers stopped what they were doing.
I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow.
The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me, were screams of laughter.

LAST BUT NOT LEAST TESTIMONY:
This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don't get any!

We had a female news anchor that, the day after it was supposed to have snowed up to a couple of inches and didn't,
turned to the weatherman and asked:
'So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?'
Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too, as they were laughing so hard!

Title: Re: As jy praat voor jy dink...
Post by: Meraai vannie Baai on January 18, 2019, 01:59:34 AM
En as jou man jou woorde letterlik opneem....  :toothy4:

(https://i847.photobucket.com/albums/ab33/raaitjie/Change%20the%20baby.jpg)
Title: Re: As jy praat voor jy dink...
Post by: Naas on January 18, 2019, 02:32:39 AM
Dis nie mooi nie. Ek het nou uit die bed geval van lag en die hele huis is wakker. Tot die buurman gil iets van werk half ses.


 :icon_bigsmurf:
Title: Re: As jy praat voor jy dink...
Post by: Meraai vannie Baai on January 18, 2019, 04:24:20 AM
As ek die goete raaklees is dit asof 'n magneet my forum toe trek - moet deel met die ouens wat ek weet net so gaan geniet Naas  :icon_biggrin:
Title: Re: As jy praat voor jy dink...
Post by: PM on January 22, 2019, 02:00:01 PM
Pragtig, ek het dit baie geniet.  Dit is nie net ons taal wat so skreeusnaaks kan wees nie.